Why Harem Intrigue When You Can Just Raise a Dog Instead (c19)

Chapter 19: Serving 1

Meng Sangyu laid on the couch while hugging A’Bao.  Because the temperature had dropped, the palace already had the fireplace lit, warm and cozy.  She only had a thin vest on, and wrapped A’Bao inside it, only letting out a dog head that was wearing a little hat. The human and dog split a soft cake and were reading the same storybook, a funny scene.

Emperor Zhou’wu was stuck between her breasts, her alluring scent was at the tip of her nose, feeling both in pain and happy.  He couldn’t resist trying to touch the woman’s body, but when he saw his paws wrapped like zongzi, he could only give up and put his attention on the book as much as he can.

“Your Ladyship, people from Imperial Household Department* just came to inform us, His Majesty will visit Bi’xiao Palace tonight. They ask for you to please prepare.” Bi’shui’s expression was dark and heavy as she walked in.  She had thought that her master had finally lost favor and the hard days of trying to curry favor were finally over, who had thought that this imbecile emperor would suddenly change his mind!

“Pu~” Meng Sangyu spat out a mouthful of cake.

“Isn’t he already unable to do it?” She grabbed her hair and shouted in disbelief!

“Woof woof woof…” Emperor Zhou’wu hollered in fury. He’s just a fake, who gave him the guts? He dares to touch our Sangyu?! Flames of anger that could reach the skies rolled in his eyes.  A’Bao’s dark black eyes were almost painted in red.

Meng Sangyu quickly patted his head in comfort. She lowered her voice in anger, “What a player! Why isn’t he showing off on his white lotus* and looking for me instead? Humph! He’s just thinking of using me as a shield for his white lotus again! Even a person made of mud is three parts Earth*. I’m going to strike! I’m quitting!”

Sangyu, good speech! Emperor Zhou’wu “woof-ed” in agreement, clearly not noticing the player she was speaking of was himself.

“Your Ladyship, what should we do?” Nurse Feng quickly asked.  She had previous been the leader in currying favor, after she realized the truth she changed jobs to being the leader in refusing favor.

“Go, take out that trump card red pill.  It’s the pill I received from the retired imperial physician Qu. Now’s the perfect time to use it.” Meng Sangyu quickly calmed, speaking to Bi’Shui as she pointed at a box.

Emperor Zhou’wu was influenced by her, and the frustration in his eyes slightly faded. He already understood, without Shen Huiru’s orders, how would the fake dare to have such guts to try and taint his inner palace? This would be a crime that kills his entire family line! It seems that the Shen family has already completely betrayed him! They’re clearly aim to first steal the throne then steal the empire!

He involuntarily clenched his front paws, even the heart-wrenching pain could not appease the furious flames of anger in his heart. His last bits of feelings for Shen Huiru and Grand Preceptor Shen were burned to ashes in these flames of fury.

It’s good that there’s still Yan Junwei who would never betray him. He still had a thread of hope! If his body dies, Junwei would also not be able to live.  He would surely slay every one of the traitors, then return the insignia of the leader of the hidden guards to the Empress Dowager before he takes his own life.  Since Junwei presently has not made a move, it must mean that his body is still safe.  Thinking of this, he lifted his head to look at Meng Sangyu.  He couldn’t decide whether or not to tell her his real identity.  If she became involved in this matter, would it bring her danger? He hesitated.

In his moment of hesitation, Meng Sangyu already carried him out of the vest, furrowing her brows, “Recently A’Bao’s has been easily excitable.  At night he tosses and turns in his sleep, seeming incredibly anxious.  Could it be that he’s in heat? But shouldn’t the earliest time poodles go into heat be at four months? A’Bao’s just three months old right?”

She said this as she turned A’Bao over to take a look at his “little brother”, then smiled in relief, “It’s ok, he’s not! If he goes into heat to early it would be bad for his growth.  A’Bao don’t be in a rush, when you come of age I’ll find you a cute wife for sure!” She said as she teased him.

Nurse Feng and Yin’Cui lowered their heads, finding their master’s expression unbearable.

Emperor Zhou’wu covered his face with his paws.  The little person in his heart already turning red, with smoke rising from his head. The him who had been hesitating immediately and firmly decided – even if you kill him he would never tell Sangyu he had been A’Bao in this lifetime. It’s too humiliating!

Unknowingly, the anger he felt at the depths of his heart and his killing intent all faded, only leaving a deep helplessness and a soft loving pamper. This woman can always make him forget all those annoying things!

“Your Ladyship, is it this?” Bi’Shui carried a little black box over, asking as she opened the lid.

“Yup, that’s it.” Meng Sangyu finally left the dumbly cute A’Bao alone. In a good mood, she picked up pill and swallowed it with water.

“Your Ladyship, what effects does this medicine have exactly?” Nurse Feng asked worriedly.

“Four hours after taking this medicine would allow for an early arrival of menstruation, and it will continue intermittently for several months nonstop.” Meng Sangyu looked at the hourglass on the corner table. She continued, “His Majesty will be here in just two hours.  Before he takes me, we still have to drag out another two hours of time until the medicine takes effect.  Aren’t they all saying he can’t do it anymore? Why is he suddenly okay again? How disappointing! But, Li Shujing is definitely more disappointed than I am!” At her last word, she started laughing.

Being wished to be inept by his own woman, Emperor Zhou’wu put down his stiff front paws, his dog face twisted.  He didn’t know what kind of expression to make, but he knew he was already deeply trapped in the fate of being a loyal dog unable to get out.  He couldn’t feel a thread of anger at her words.  All he wanted to do is to love her and make her little mouth unable to say other words when he returns to his body.

Thinking of this, his nose itched.  He quickly licked away the warmth at the tip of his nose when Meng Sangyu wasn’t paying attention.  After he finished licking it, he was depressed.  How could he eat his own blood from his nose? God! This dark history needs to be sunk in the Yalong River tied to thousand-ton weights.

Seeing A’Bao shiver, Nurse Feng thought he was cold.  She tugged a little cloth to cover his belly and continued to ask, “Nonstop menstruation for several months? Your Ladyship, would this affect your body?”

“It won’t, father saved imperial physician Qu’s son before. In gratitude, imperial physician Qu had once secretly taken my pulse*, he was the one who told me the secret behind the medicine His Majesty had granted me.  This medicine is not poisonous, instead, it can get rid of a part of the accumulated poison in my body.  It’s good for my health.  When the poison is about cleared, my menstruation will naturally stop.  I didn’t want a child at the time so I’ve left it. After several months, I would think Li Shujing and Shen Huiru’s battle would be over.” Meng Sangyu replied.

Nurse Feng, Bi’Shui, Yin’Cui all had expressions of relief.

Old imperial physician Qu, silently remembering this name in unending gratitude, Emperor Zhou’wu used his front paws to cover his little heart. His twisted dog face finally returned to normal.

There was still two hours before the emperor arrives, but Meng Sangyu couldn’t just sit and wait.  She still had to bathe and apply perfume, dressing herself up to appear vibrant and lively.  Only then could she go to the palace doors to wait thirty minutes before arrival.

Emperor Zhou’wu’s four paws still have not recovered, he couldn’t walk.  He was placed in a basket next to the couch, the couch was placed across from a huge silk screen. Behind the screen, there were clouds of steam and the sound of streaming water, you could just barely see an elegant figure sitting in the tub a

nd playing with the water.  The strong flowery scent mixed with a thread of moisture crawled into his nose, into his heart, making Emperor Zhou’wu’s heart pound crazily.

He couldn’t control himself from staring intently at the huge screen, his dark eyes showing a hidden flow of light.  His intent stare could almost burn through the silk and see the figure hiding behind it.

A while later, the sound of water stopped. A pale figure rose from the tub and its shadow laid on the screen.  The figure had perfect proportions, a round bust, a flat and thin waist, slender legs… every part was an alluring scenery. Unknowingly, the little girl from back then had already grown up, but he had missed every part of her growth.  Realizing this, the light in Emperor Zhou’wu’s eyes dimmed.  He buried his head in his paws, his curled up figure looking incredibly lonely.

Moments later, Meng Sangyu came out wearing a white undergarment* with a cloak made of white silk on top.  She picked A’Bao up from the basket and sat before the makeup stand for Nurse Feng and Bi’Shui to do her hair.

Entering a familiar embrace, Emperor Zhou’wu immediately escaped from his bad mood.  He reached out to grab a strand of hair before him.  If we had hands, these three thousand strands of black silk would be left to ourselves to take care of. As he thought to himself, he remembered that in just a while Sangyu’s beauty would be preyed upon by an unknown fake, his black eyes uncontrollably expressed a thread of killing intent.

He collected himself and used his front paws to hug the silky threads before him.  He held them close and took a careful sniff, drunken while thinking of quickly healing and going to the secret tunnel in the imperial garden to contact Yan Junwei.  The Shen family is already showing signs of treason, Junwei would surely use everything in his power to get his body out of the palace. But with the fake emperor in court, he may only be able to check up on the palace every once in a while.  He just needed a write a message and put it in the crevice they often use to pass on messages.  Junwei would find it sooner or later.

“Just do a simple hairstyle and put a peony on.  I’ll do my makeup myself.” As he was lost in his thoughts he heard the should of a woman’s relaxed voice and the strand of hair in his paws was stolen from him.

Emperor Zhou’wu furrowed his brows and whimpered unsatisfied. Meng Sangyu gently petted him and touched his little wet nose tip. A slight tint of happiness uncontrollably rose from his heart.  He bit on to that finger, using his teeth to rub on it, not wanting to let go.

“Okay, okay. You be good and watch on the side, I’m going to do my makeup now.” Laughing quietly as she retreated her finger, Meng Sangyu put A’Bao on the makeup stand. She picked up a bottle of lotion and carefully spread it on her face…

The originally pale face became even whiter, seeming a little sickly.  Adding on bright red lipstick and heavy eyeliner, although the face was still very beautiful, there was an added darkness and it was less lively and natural.   Emperor Zhou’wu’s felt a tint of bitterness in his heart as he looked at her appearance: they all say women dress for their love interests, but Sangyu never thought of displaying her most beautiful side to us, from which we can see she doesn’t feel anything for us!

The bitterness was interrupted by a cold touch at the corner of his eyes. Emperor Zhou’wu returned from his thoughts to see Meng Sangyu quickly draw three lines at the corner of his eyes with a liner with a sly little smile.  He reflexively reached out his front paws, trying to scratch at it.

“Don’t scratch, if you scratch it off, no food!” Meng Sangyu made a strict face to scare him, her bright phoenix eyes full of laughter.

Emperor Zhou’wu paused and immediately put down his paws.

“Good boy!” Kissing A’Bao’s little mouth, Meng Sangyu drew another three lines on the other side and started laughing.

“Oh my, what happened to A’Bao? Is he aging already?” Bi’Shui and Yin’Cui were red from holding back laughter, their voices shaking as they teased.  The shaven dog face was lightly pink with three dark black lines as if wrinkles at his eye corners.  His appearance was hilarious, making one unable to hold back their laughter. Emperor Zhou’wu could imagine how dumb he looked.  He stiffly turned around, his entire body emitting a dark and gloomy aura, facing his butt to Meng Sangyu.  But as he looked at the figure in the mirror, a look of pamper was thick and hidden at the bottom of his eyes. If he could sacrifice his image in exchange for her laughter, he was willing.



*Imperial Household Department [Not too sure about this, correct me – T]
Original: 敬事房
Explanation: This department is said to basically manage all the matters of the royal family including the servants, the bedroom chamber, etc.  The typical understanding is that this branch of organizations in the palace is solely to manage the bedroom activity of the emperor and to make sure that if there are any of the emperor’s women pregnant at this time that the child is indeed the emperors.  However, the department actually does quite a bit.

*Even a person made of mud is three parts Earth
Original: 泥人也有三分土性
Explanation: Describing that even the softest, most powerless people have grit to them and will fight back.

*White lotus
Original: 白莲花
Direct Translation: White Lotus
Explanation: Used in description of pure and elegant women – emphasis on pure. In novels, they’re also typically rather weak/sickly and unreasonably benevolent.

*taken… pulse
Original: 诊过脉
Explanation: In traditional Chinese medicine (TCM), taking a pulse is used as a method part of diagnosis.

Original: 亵衣
Explanation: A type of undergarment in ancient times.  Veeery different from modern day undergarments. Kinda like pajamas, but you don’t only wear it to sleep.

Clam Spam:
Clam was told to be more tactful. So:
As mentioned in a comment below, I’m currently traveling in China, and there’s a political campaign for de-blacking [guys I’m making up words but you get it, right?]. The portions not included will not affect story progression, but feel free to read youdidnotseeme‘s [darn you caught me >_<] comment below for translation of the omissions. ; ) Sorry about this!

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12 thoughts on “Why Harem Intrigue When You Can Just Raise a Dog Instead (c19)

  1. Thanks for the chapters! Love this story!!!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. 1。)她边说边将阿宝翻转过来,去看他剃得光溜溜的小j-j
    Eh? Where is the sentence “she saw his cleanly shaven ‘small brother’?

    2。)只想着回魂以后定要好好疼爱桑榆,让她的小嘴除了呻-吟再也说不出别的话语。=All he wanted to do is to love her and make her little mouth unable to say other words when he returns to his body.

    This sentence seem to be missing some word such as “making her little mouth unable to say other words except moaning when he returns to his body.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sorry I’ll add an explanation for this in the chapter as well. I’m currently traveling in China and I’d rather play it safe for now cause right now there’s some sort of political campaign. >_<;; I'll mark this for edit.

      Liked by 3 people

    2. I must say that emperor’s idea of pampering and loving somehow is reduced only to bed in which Meng Sangyu will only have to serve more and nothing more. It is so superficial.


  3. Anyway thanks for your hard work! I really anticipate every translated chapters. Dying for more updates😍😍

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Thanks for the chapter! 💕


  5. Thank you for the chapter! 💕💕💕💕


  6. I wish emperor stays a dog forever.. it seems he makes a much better dog that a man


  7. Ahh that last line reminded me of that Chinese Emperor who would light signal fires and trick his armies to make Bao Si laugh. Well, I doubt our MC will let him become a fatuous ruler.


    1. Hmm I’m not familiar with that story, but it sounds fascinating! Our MC is too level headed, I wish she could just think about herself more… 😥


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